Shine

Been away for a long time. Don't even think ple come to this blog again. Well, let's take it as my space where i can have a conversation with myself to sort out the things in my own head.

Been having some 'eye-opening' expereince at work recently. I shall not reveal exactly what it is. It's just the usual office politics. I know, it's everywhere. As long as there's ple, there's politics. However, i've always tot my workplace somehow lacked the normal scandal that usually goes on in the sky scrapers of Raffles Place.I was sadly mistaken. It is so bad that I am considering my future in this place.

Yes, ple say stuff like ' oh, i don't care for politics. It's all for the kids in the end' or 'as long as i becareful and get out of the way, i won't be picked on'. Yes, for me, it's all for the kids. However, i cannot say that i don't care for it becos i am IN it. No matter how 'bo chup' i am towards office politics, i will never be able to escape from it. Not here, not anywhere. And for my situation, if i'm doing it for the kids, i natually become a potential target.

So i asked myself and i asked God. How? How can i face these ple with the same innocence that i have seen them in? How can i continue to work with these ple who i have to constantly keep my eye on? How do i respond to them? What if i were to be under them one day? Will i act for or against them and who am i in front of them and in front of the others?' For me, i just simply cannot act blur. I'm no longer 'blur' of all these things that are happening around me and even though i can act, there will be a inner conflict within me.

As i was walking out from the place, i saw this verse on the T-Shirt of a GB girl. It simply said " Let your light shine before man..Matthew 5:16" And God just spoke to me. He comforted me and reminded me of who i am. I belong to Jesus. I am the light of the world and the salt of the earth. I am who He called me to be. I am His light where there is darkness and injustice. I am His light where there is hopelessness and disillusion. I am His light where there is corruption and disunity. I am His light. And that's what God wants me to be in this place. As i have learnt from a sister, my job is to love ple, not to change ple. That is God's job. Similarily, my job is to love ple, not judge ple. God is the judge. God is MY judge. So ever if this politics is being thrown at my face, i need not fear. Because i know who my judge is. I know what i have been doing and i will be blameless.

As for my future, i need not fear because it is not in their hands, it's in God's hands. And at the end of the day, God will be the judge. I will fear God, not man. I will trust God, not man. However, i will love God, AND MAN. Help me Jesus, as i tap on Your unfailing love to love others, even those who persecute me, stab me in the back, show me injustice and try to stop my success.

"Let your light shine before man, that they will see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven." Matthew 5:16

"Don't be afraid of those who want to kill you. They can only kill your body; they cannot touch your soul. Fear only God, who can destroy both soul ad body in hell." Matthew 10:28

How Sway Can One Get?

All my life, i have been an active and outdoor person who loves sports and adventures like sky diving, bungee jumping and all that. However, i have been plauged with a very clumsy body and jinxed by God knows what. I never fail to injure myself. Most of my injuries were result of either carelessness or clumsiness. Hiaz... i'll always be a duck.. never a graceful swan. This year has been a pretty awful one.
1. Fractured ankle in May
2. Admitted to hospital in October
3. Sprained ankle in October

I remember telling someone that TTSH is my second home. I guess it really is.

What Type are You??

Okie.. i felt much better this morning. Still a bit blue but at least i can say it's been good.

Took this kind of personality test today. Found it on seng's blog. Really good!! Very very very true. It's like totally talking about me. So if you wanna understand how i work... just look below.

The Helper

you chose CX - your Enneagram type is TWO.

"I must help others"

Helpers are warm, concerned, nurturing, and sensitive to other people's needs.

How to Get Along with Me
• Tell me that you appreciate me. Be specific.
• Share fun times with me.
• Take an interest in my problems, though I will probably try to focus on yours.
• Let me know that I am important and special to you.
• Be gentle if you decide to criticize me.

In Intimate Relationships
• Reassure me that I am interesting to you.
• Reassure me often that you love me.
(piggy, now you know why i always ask you that question even though you've told me so many times : > )
• Tell me I'm attractive and that you're glad to be seen with me.

What I Like About Being a Two
• being able to relate easily to people and to make friends
• knowing what people need and being able to make their lives better
• being generous, caring, and warm
• being sensitive to and perceptive about others' feelings
• being enthusiastic and fun-loving, and having a good sense of humor

What's Hard About Being a Two
• not being able to say no
• having low self-esteem
• feeling drained from overdoing for others
• not doing things I really like to do for myself for fear of being selfish
• criticizing myself for not feeling as loving as I think I should
• being upset that others don't tune in to me as much as I tume in to them
• working so hard to be tactful and considerate that I suppress my real feelings

Twos as Children Often
• are very sensitive to disapproval and criticism
• try hard to please their parents by being helpful and understanding
• are outwardly compliant
• are popular or try to be popular with other children
• act coy, precocious, or dramatic in order to get attention
• are clowns and jokers (the more extroverted Twos)ME!!, or quiet and shy (the more introverted Twos)

Twos as Parents
• are good listeners, love their children unconditionally, and are warm and encouraging (or suffer guilt if they aren't)
• are often playful with their children
• wonder: "Am I doing it right?" "Am I giving enough?" "Have I caused irreparable damage?"
• can become fiercely protective



Definately me! So this is me... What type are you??

PS: Piggy.. go take the test!! Wanna noe wat type you are..

http://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=6711512663497470889

Have you ever?

Have you ever felt terrible the moment you opened your eyes in the morning. Or ever felt like just sitting there and crying all day? Ever felt like you don't exist, or just extremely tired in your soul? How about the feeling that you're so hollow that the wind could blow right through you? Ever wondered why it's so bright and sunny outside when you feel so cold and dreary inside? Ever tot of how you'd like to die?

Well... if you've tot of one of the above, i noe how you feel cos i've been like dat for the past two days. I don't noe why. Nothing's wrong, nothing's changed. Ever since Sunday morning it's been with me. Can't seem to shake it off. There's the hugs and kissies from my piggy that brighten things up a little but my mind just goes back into that mode again after a while. Dunno man.. think i got bitten by the depression bug. But hey, they all say, it's a mindset. The mind is a powerful thing. I know it well. I guess i have to really 'snap out of it'. I have to. I can do. I'd better do. I don't wanna be this way. I hate it. I don't want to depress ple around me too. Got to get out of it. Got to have paradiam shift in mindset. Got to get a cream for the bite by the depression bug. Got to...

Happy Teacher's Day

Wow, just a week back and it's teacher's day... how lucky can i get?? enjoyed myself though and the kids were so sweet. Look at all the presies they gave me. Okie.. shall open them now.... at 1a.m. as i put my cake in the oven



Cool.. got really great presents this year!! Pretty quality stuff. Here are my two personal favs...



From the boy who refuses to write the date on his worksheets. Ironic.



Blue blue roses.... so sweet.. from the twins in my class.

Happy Teacher's day... to anyone who has held a child's hand and taught him/her to do something.

First Day of School

I love working. Keeps my mind occupied and my hands something to do. Not to mention the extra calories burnt in the meantime.. hehe. I love my work too. I guess the kids really missed me when i was gone. They came up to be during reading period and gave me all these small little gifts. So touched. There was a card that almost made me cry... Check this out



So sweeeeeeeet....... And my flens were all so supportive and kind. They even got me a get well present! But i haven't got it yet cos they didn't noe was going to be back yesterday.

So i guess it's time to work hard!! However term 4 will be quite a hectic yet slack term. Hectic cos of the end of year exams, slack cos of all the holidays. Well, i wanna do my best for my kids before they move on the P3. Do hope to move with them too.

First Day of School

After 16 weeks of MC, i am finally going back to school (to the relieve of my mother). Really excited about it! so i'm all dressed and ready to go. First stop, P's office. Must give him formal greeting after MIAing for so long. Then next, a letter to the parents to thank them for their understanding and also to inform them of a one-to-one session with their child. Next, catching up with my flens and then it's back to the classroom. Update u all again when i finish school today. Fingers crossed that i retain my sanity at the end of the day.